"Healthy boundaries." We hear that phrase a lot in the current era, and with good reason.
Boundaries aren't always easy to set. A confusion happens for some of us because we're coached to be "nice." Of course we should extend kindness to others; we have to maintain a certain level of civility in society.
However, and this is important: kindness includes us. Kindness is not being a doormat to someone else's every whim. Standing up for yourself isn't a matter of being mean or lacking kindness; in fact, standing up and showing a clear boundary to someone may be an act of kindness in itself, as it shows the other person that there consequences for unwholesome actions.
To be a bit more personal, today I had to make a decision to set a boundary. This experience was highly uncomfortable to me, as I'm much more keen on attempting to work things out and create some kind of happy resolution. That's not always possible, and some people are unwilling to be receptive to the goodwill of others.
Demeaning comments and harassment of a friend online led to my blocking a person from a social media account. It wasn't my first choice, but given the circumstances, it was the best option.
What makes this boundary healthy? Well, after multiple chances, I finally took action. I could've blocked sooner when the vaguely rude comments only targeted me, but that may have been too quick and evidence of overreaction on my part; I could've done nothing, but that would've come with the risk of a future situation escalating into something worse.
So I used the social media tools that are available to us all to put an end to the rude comments and harassment, setting a very healthy boundary for everyone involved. No anger, preachiness, or rudeness on my end was involved.
What are boundaries that you've had to set in your life?
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